long time no post

Hard to believe I haven't updated this page in over a year. The past year has been...well, it's been something alright. That isn't to say migraines weren't there during any of it--they've been here all along, as always. Here are some things:

My lifestyle, my activity level(s), my diet...everything has changed. I'm still a vegetarian/mostly vegan(lactose intolerance will do that to ya), but now I implement much, much more protein in my diet on a daily basis. I'd say, for the most part, my diet is heavy on the protein and much lighter on the carbs. I eat a lot of seafood(mainly salmon, shrimp, white fish). I snack on a handful of almonds or granola as opposed to chips. So far this is working for me.

Activity level: I developed a love for yoga which quickly transitioned into weightlifting. Now I lift on a very regular basis, 6 days a week. I feel stronger overall, which cuts down on the back/neck pain, which in turn cuts down on head pain. This helped inspire me to change my lifestyle overall--I barely drink alcohol anymore and I don't really like to stay out past/or until midnight. Getting much more sleep helps with my chronic pain tremendously. Also, now that I live in Egypt, there is less for me to do in general...so it's easier to retire early. However, the added heat does aggravate my head pain, so I try to stay out of it when I can. I've also discovered that cigar smoke can trigger a bad headache if I'm around it for too long.

My big triggers nowadays are: menstrual cycle(per usual), and travel. I travel much more than I ever have in the past, and my travel is usually quite extensive. Egypt to the states and back again is about 24 hours of travel, which means uninterrupted sleep and food schedules. I keep snacks with me and try to get sleep when/where I can. Jet lag is a big trigger as well, but that's one of those things you have to go through to get through.

Supplements I currently take: B-complex, calcium, magnesium, biotin.

I'm back on Zoloft which has helped pain, but moreso depression/overactive mind. I also take Aleve on a near daily basis. I'm in a great place mentally, and physically I am stronger than I've ever been. Migraines are definitely something I live with and make do with. I try not to let it run my life...it will still come up and ruin plans now and again but, for the most part, I can identify triggers and avoid them.

a midsummer update

I realize I need to update this blog more. Here are some things:

I had one hardcore migraine while I was in Egypt. Triggered after drinking some wine the night before. I threw up lots of Gatorade, and slept until I felt better. She passed within 10 hours. I ate once that day.

I had one last night but hit the pillow just in time. I fell asleep with half a sleeping pill in me and a cold wash rag on my head. I had strange dreams but woke up feeling much better. This one triggered by my cycle(it's the minefield week--when all potential triggers are glowing neon and in my way, and more things than not spark the dull pain).

I've been trying a new meal plan where I eat 5 small meals a day. I like it so far. Tomorrow I leave for Florida for a week and I'm looking forward to getting some decent seafood.

I don't really drink anymore. I had some gin and tonics in Egypt(and that awful wine) but I am too petrified by the prospect of a hangover(which always always turns into a ridiculous migraine battle). The buzz isn't worth the aftermath. Because of this I'm learning to be quite careful with my intake and that makes me happy. There was a time in my life when I didn't understand limits with alcohol--I drank to get drunk, to feel it the next day. It's so much better to be responsible.

I am still taking B-Complex vitamins as well as magnesium and butterber. I'm hydrated like whoa. Even when I drink a coffee, I have water right along with it. I will have a soda now and then, but very rarely. The kicking of that lifelong habit is still such a victory for me.

I've noticed with age that my sweettooth has diminished greatly. The sweets I want are fruits, if anything. Now if only jelly beans ceased existing. Quite a few of my migraines this year have been triggered by eating too many jelly beans. Oh my delicious kryptonite.

I've been off antidepressants completely for one month. I'm very happy to report that my number of migraines has stayed very very low since then. I was worried that my head might bloom into a war zone once I stopped taking them. I believe that not working in an office has changed the game, headache-wise. It's so nice to have the freedom to treat the pain before it becomes unmanageable.

long time, no post

I haven't updated this blog in a while. I wish I could say it's because I haven't had any migraines but that isn't true. The past few months I've been hit hard with head pain in tandem with my cycle--it starts a few days before my period starts(a few days before that I start feeling very depressed/achy/anxious...it took me a surprisingly long time to connect all of the dots on this one). The migraine will flicker on and off for a week from its start date. Last month and this month were both giant pains in the ass(and head). I end up bedridden with the spins and superstrong nausea, sensitivity to light and smells.

I struggle at times to explain what it feels like to have a hyper-sensitivity to the elements when I have a migraine. It truly does feel like the world is designed to be out to get you. Yesterday I left work early with the migraine rearing its head again, and on the bus a woman sat down next to me who had perfume on that instantly upped my head pain to a 9 or 10. Or even waiting at the bus, when it seems like every other person is a smoker and the wind is blowing it right in my face. Smells of food cooking or exhaust seem to pull the vomit right from my stomach. The world becomes overwhelming. I just want to run and hide.

Today I am feeling more and more like myself. It is ridiculous--the difference in me when in pain vs. when I'm not in pain. Everything is so much more complicated under the influence of pain. I need to wash my hair and clean my apartment AND prepare for two shows this weekend--I'm trying not to overwhelm myself by tackling it all tonight, but I do worry that I may not have another chance(what if the migraine comes back tomorrow night, for example? I hate to think these things, but have to).

My diet: I have strayed from how strict I was in past months in regards to my intake. I still avoid fermented foods and MSG when possible. The soda habit is STILL kicked, which is awesome--I've lost probably 5 to 7 pounds from abstaining from that alone. I've been lapsing on my smoothie game but hope to get back to it asap.

Supplements: Every day I take: Vitamin C, Vitamin D(especially now that it's winter), BComplex, Butterbur, Magnesium/Calcium. I am still a firm believer in this combination cutting down on the frequency and severity of my attacks.

I've had less attacks in the past 6 months, but the attacks are more intense in their own ways. Perhaps because I have less of them? Maybe because they seem to circle around my hormonal monthly rollercoaster? Maybe. It is still the pain I hate most in my life more than anything.

More soon.

raw

I think that I'm ready to tweak this diet some more. If I can get to a 40-50% raw food diet, that would be ideal. Right now I'm at the beginning of the beginning. Research.

I've been thinking about this for a while, and stumbling across a raw vegan brownie recipe this evening sealed the deal.

Some awesome things:

- zucchini used in place of linguine. Julienne that shit lengthways to make noodles.

- pizza crust out of coconut meat, almond pulp, tomato, garlic, flax seed meal, and basil. Whaaaaaaaat? That sounds incredible.

- there is a recipe for raw vegan lasagna and it sounds delicious and looks kind of crazy.

- my eyebrows raise higher on my head every time I read another raw recipe.

And I'll definitely be documenting it. I can't wait to try kelp noodles. I can't wait to make cinnamon oranges for desert. Man oh man. This is gonna be fun.

white nailed on the wagon

Life's been good. Really good. Spring is here, and that always helps to boost the mood. And a boosted mood means less tension emotionally and physically, which means I can relax more, which means less pain. Which is a very very good thing.

I am still taking my supplements every day. Still reading the label of everything I ingest. This month I fell off track a little bit, in regards to taking care of meals myself. I get busy and/or I get home late and feel too lazy to cook meals ahead of time. This needs to change. The guilt of it is already eating at me. I haven't had a smoothie in a week. But if one falls, then one must simply get back up. So definitely starting the day off with a smoothie tomorrow.

Earlier this week I woke up with a pretty gnarly migraine. I knew I couldn't miss work--I was filling in for the receptionist and I'm out of time off for the month. At first I was really worried about getting to work, and making it through my day AND through my plans in the evening. I decided to give the whole "don't panic" thing a shot and breathed my way through the early a.m. I suited up for the ride and took the bike into work instead of the bus. The fresh air and exercise is often a wonderful help when it comes to my head pain. Blood pumping, lungs filling. It works for me. Before I hopped on the bike I took an Aleve. I drank water throughout the day and avoided all my food triggers. And I couldn't believe it: by 3pm I had shoved the pain completely out of my body.

That simply...never happens to me. If I have it, then I have it. It's hard for me to override the progression once it starts...especially if I find myself waking up with a migraine. But I did it.

I am feeling like a different person these days. I had a bunch of dead hair cut off my head and it feels pretty damn good. I've also been writing a lot these past few months...the truth is, with less migraines each week, I can get more done. It truly feels like I am blessed with extra days. I used to never have a Monday night wtihout some sort of head pain. Now, for the past 2 weeks I've been able to get out and do things on that evening. I find myself with all of this extra time and...opportunity. I can commit to social things, see people I adore, and workout every day like I want to. Less frequent pain means I have more free time, and it also means I am generally happier and less tense. My anxiety is starting to feel much more manageable. I fear these suckers so much...I'm not surprised in my new found level of calm.

My next goal is to find a therapist that I click with. I'm ready to tackle the emotional triggers. I've been in a push-me-pull-me state with it for most of my life...now I feel like I am ready to let all of it go. Getting my hair cut last weekend really triggered something in me in regards to being lighter. That lightness. I deserve it. I want it. I'm ready to fight for it and make it mine.

I have also started to reread A Brain Wider than the Sky, by Andrew Levy. I love ths book so much, more than any other text/literature written about migraines. I am maybe 3 pages in and already I have had tears in my eyes while reading. It feels like a miracle to read about this illness in a language that I can understand and relate to.

Bottom line: I am feeling less and less like an illness and more and more like a person. Someone that can function and can make plans AND take care of myself. So far so great.

update

The new diet is quickly becoming simply "my intake." The newness is fading. It is now a normal morning function--set up the blender, dump in my fruit, juice and flax seeds...fill my pill sorter with my daily intake. Some stats:

Supplements:

2 butterbur/day
2 magnesium/day
2 calcium & vitamin d/day
1 B Complex vitamin

Daily smoothie
blueberries, strawberries, orange-pineapple juice, flax seeds, cherries
(ingredients rotate depending on what I'm in the mood for)

I keep breakfast simple. Smoothie, Special K with Berries, 1 cup. Or an egg beater omelette with salsa on the weekend. I cook a lot more these days. I think it's simply par for the course when you are trying to weed out over processed foods and things like msg, corn syrup. I haven't had chinese take out since this whole thing started...at least 2 months now. I no longer miss it.

Grocery shopping continues to be quite the adventure--I read the labels of everything. No matter how much I might crave/want it, if it has too many ingredients and/or ingredients I can't pronounce, then I put it back. The one thing breaking this rule is caffeine. I vow to one day put down the soda.

I've been sleeping like a champ. If I'm having trouble, I take a melatonin and that does the trick.

I haven't had a bad migraine in about 2 weeks.

Every day I ride at least 10 miles on the bike trainer. Spin class at least once a week. Today I rode into work. As the weather warms up I'm excited for my mileage to increase as well. The hills were very easy today. Felt great.

All this to say I've found some things that work for me in terms of pain management and relief. It is not perfect, and I'm not "cured," by my goodness life has gotten so much better. Easier. I can commit to things and show up as opposed to having to cancel due to pain. I feel great about these changes and this is just the beginning.

remember this, self.

Today marks one week with no migraines.

If you were me you would find this slightly amazing.

I'm following my diet, taking my supplements, and reducing my triggers. And filling my life with more things I love and less of what stresses me out. It's a simple formula. And it's working.

I can't even...yeah. I'm happy.

the beginning of the beginning

Change is tough, especially when it comes to breaking habits...especially habits that taste really damn good and aren't that good for you. I'm 31 and still cling to a not-so-secret soda habit. The comfort in it is long gone, and now the act of ingesting it is more reflex than anything. This alone blares big and neon to me, like HEY PAY ATTENTION AND MAKE A CONSCIOUS EFFORT TO BE INVOLVED IN YOUR INTAKE! Which leads me to right now, when I'm trying to be.

A list of migraine triggering foods is long, incomplete and not the same for you as it is for me. Triggers can vary from person to person. However, there are a few hard-hitting triggers such as:

- caffeine
- msg
- red wine (which I haven't had a glass of since I was about 20 years old. I know better)

Caffeine is something I find quite tricky, since it is a main ingredient in some medicines that are used to treat headaches(such as Excedrin Migraine and Cafergot). Personally, I feel like I have an internal dial set to a specific amount of caffeine. Too much too soon and I'm in a world of hurt. Too little too late? Again, I'm in a world of hurt. I am starting to cut back on my caffeine intake. Slowly, ever so slowly. I fear the headaches brought on by caffeine withdrawal(which can last up to 2 weeks).

MSG. I am making a conscious effort to remove this from my diet whenever/wherever possible. Saying this breaks my heart a little bit, because it means no more cheap chinese take out. You must understand that I loooove my chinese food.

the creepy thing about MSG is that it isn't always listed as MSG. It is monosodium glutamate. It may be also called: autolyzed yeaste, sodium/calcium caseinate, glutamic acid, gelatin.

At present there is an FDA requirement to include the protein source when listing hydrolyzed protein products on labels of processed foods. Examples are hydrolyzed soy protein, hydrolyzed wheat protein, hydrolyzed pea protein, hydrolyzed whey protein, hydrolyzed corn protein. If a tomato, for example, were whole, it would be identified as a tomato. Calling an ingredient tomato protein indicates that the tomato has been hydrolyzed, at least in part, and that processed free glutamic acid (MSG) is present.

This is the first and most important step in changing my diet thus far: READ LABELS. Read the label of everything you ingest. If you don't have a label for what you are eating and it's possible, then ask about the ingredients. Right now I'm doing my best to NOT eat foods label-less(this also helps me to abstain from eating out a lot and pushes me to cook mroe at home). I think people, in general, would eat very differently if they had to read the labels/ingredients for everything ingested. Most of it is impossible for the common human to interpret let alone pronounce.

Today I read the ingredients on my baby carrots. It looked like this:

INGREDIENTS: Carrots

There is a lot of information packed onto labels so do yourself a favor and learn how to read them. There are lots of resources on the web to help. Such as this one:


Also, when reading ingredients, pay special attention to the first three or four ingredients listed. Ingredients are listed from most to last. If you see high fructose corn syrup listed second, then yeah. It's got some crap in it. Probably unhealthy.

Again, this is a long process for me. Next week I start replacing one meal a week with a smoothie packed with spinach(magnesium), orange juice(vitamin c), flax seed and other nontrigger fruits.

Here is a list of things that I have cut from my diet so far, as they are potential migraine triggers for me. I will update this list as my diet evolves. Right now, it's quite short:

- avocados (this makes me sad)
- balsamic vinegar
- veggie burgers
- potato chips
- kimchi (sigh. I will miss you so)

More soon because this lady is just getting started. So far it's been rather easy, but I know it's only going to get more challenging. Will I ever give up my comfort in soda? Will I give up my precious french fries? I shudder to think. Buuuuut if it means less migraines then it's worth it.

supplement this

Part of bulking up my anti-migraine arsenal involves supplements--vitamins/minerals I take daily to keep my levels correct. Individuals with migraines are more succeptible to B vitamin deficiencies as well as a magnesium deficiency. I've added both to my daily intake. I invested 99 cents in one of these bad boys:


Nossir, they're not just for grandparents anymore.

However, even with this handy sorter, I can forget to refill each day, so I keep the bottles of vitamins in my bathroom medicine cabinet where I'm bound to run into them while reaching for the toothpaste. The more visual reminders I can have, the better. Instead of filling for the week on Sunday, I usually fill it day by day, first thing in the morning. Don't ask me why. Sometimes I like to take the long way around.

What's in my caddy:

Super B-complex vitamin - vitamin B1, B2, B3, B5, B6, B7, B9, B12. Health benefits are linked to the immune and nervous system, and they also support energy growth in cells. B vitamin supplements definitely give me more energy, and they cut through that daily low headache I tend to get. It also makes your pee super-yellow.

Biotin - though I have stopped taking this since I started the Super B--Biotin is another name for B7, so I'm already getting some of that. Promotes healthy skin, nail and hair growth.

Magnesium - Now, magnesium is the supplement I just started taking, and I'm already finding that I need to tweak how I go about it. Research shows that magnesium levels affect serotonin and NMDA receptors in the brain--both are involved with migraines in some fashion. Here's some numbers:

It is responsible for over 300 essential metabolic reactions in the body. It is required for synthesizing proteins in the mitochondria, the metabolic powerhouses of your cells, and for generating energy in most of the body’s basic cellular reactions. It is necessary for several steps in the synthesis of DNA and RNA. Magnesium is also present in a number of other important enzymes. As important as it is intracellularly, 60% of the body’s magnesium is present in bone, and 27% in muscle. -(migrainesurvival.com)

And I just found out that it's best to take this with calcium, so there's another supplement to add to my trusty caddy. Magnesium is also found in certain foods such as spinach, kiwi, brown rice, raisins, beet greens, tomato paste. Another thing magnesium does? Helps with constipation. In other words, the mag helps ya poop. This is another reason to wean myself off caffeine as well--caffeine decreases the amount of magnesium absorbed in the digestive track. Another fun little fact: if you drink a lot of coffee, you probably have a magnesium deficiency for this very reason. How to fix that? Eat more foods rich in magnesium. This is a part of my diet I am certainly struggling with, as soda and coffee provide me with some warped sense of comfort left over from my younger years. I'm slowly cutting away at my intake--key word being slowly, as I'm quite afraid of caffeine withdrawal headaches(I get enough of them...I really don't need to add another type to the bin).

A few things I am preparing to add to my daily intake:

Butterbur - Butterbur is a herb that, according to some researchers, may cut short the duration and intensity of migraine attacks. Info:

Migraine incidence decrease ranged from 37% - 62% among analysis participants, with approximately no side effects. The only offshoot stated was slight gastrointestinal upset, and that was in a little part of both the herb and placebo groups. - articlesolve.com, "Migraine Busting Butterber"

More thoughts on this after I start taking it.

Feverfew - Feverfew has been used traditionally to treat headaches. It's a member of the sunflower family(this random fact tickled me for some reason). Also:

Another study found that people who took a carbon dioxide extract of feverfew had fewer average number of migraine attacks per month compared to people who took placebo. A 3-month study with 49 people found that a combination of feverfew, magnesium, and vitamin B2 led to a 50% decrease in migraine attacks.

Source: http://www.umm.edu/altmed/articles/feverfew-000243.htm#ixzz2Ku8XXfP9

Up next, more on my diet/food intake. What I'm taking out, what I'm adding, and what(if anything) I've learned so far.